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#queerterror (Extended)

by Worshiprr

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Vivienigma
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Vivienigma I love this album. The dark abrasive hip hop electro and the hard driving lyricism really make an impression. It's radical and unflinching. Just amazing.
The second half of Summation/Fluster has some lines that are like a spear to my little trans heart. Favorite track: Summation / Fluster.
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1.
Form verse 1 (which one is the real you?) neither fragments nor planets or nothing where the money in the mask slips exploiting me with a chemical accident beauty is a beast with no sense of its own requirements I'll never fall asleep but My jaw has finally stopped grinding the perception is so perilous window in my whereabouts afraid of my ability terrorizing my failure disembodied voices that I'll never respond to static in the radio burning up in a car bodies on the staircase a type of sacrament offering gore puzzle locking scared of my sense of mockery stock in life plummets but I won't buy it a casket a picture of me forms covered in skin and laughing no matter if we crush our fingers clasped in a hold we still trip in puddles of glass and Ash all we know (what do you believe in?) something about our love requires a blood masterpiece yet Everything I am seems nothing of what I had to be she can carry wounded and I'll stick to the harmful we both leave our marks but I'm wary of sharkskin feel my tunnel light death beams furthering the facade the ID behind the due process cleanliness to godliness Goddexx doesn't know cleanliness chaos in this dream so I might leave some remnants of teeth in your palms perfect for this occasion catch me caring for gluttony subsisting on starvation seeds in my arrogance pupils wide and defiant whether I am the room or the body smashed in the sides I contemplate paradoxes ferrying romance to death as a slow craze she feels her reach stumble in me grasping for my sense but never have known pain you can keep pushing daisies none of them are buttons but I am your cocaine I have left here willingly no matter your objections the fuck of it all raised reach into the voidlust fingers out nails clipped dirt speaks ribs open deep into the fetishism pulse is a deer Hunter bred in the dead of winter I kiss your fanaticism fuck you into submission you moan and writhe nasty then kick me off of your body I fall to my death in the streets of the cross walking verse 2 (are you a boy or a girl?) I'm the 4x4 room centerfold she lies nude she picks brightly colored branches and a half blood moon fear is snails in a sandbox scars and a broken handle her body is a shift and revolt of the numb and narrow spit bile nauseous fantasies of being pregnant birth as a delivery malnourished by a placenta bite over umbilical shape of an empty snake extends to the infinite blood on the screaming infant color flashed crib elastic flesh over ribs expands in the vision the acid just thrown in I've sat beneath disfigured body light brass ornaments god's mirrors come alive when my best begats hornets swallow melting curvature pray onto the surface meal worms in my mandy exploding beside curtains Everything I wanted is dead and the bone charcoal my center is with peace So I burst with such violence she is working thru my veins of salt and my will iron even Harmony has a day when the kloch must be rewinded Idle At The Red light I want to pour loneliness on you syrup like thick from a lifetime in basements the towers transmute us I used to see limelights and bent figure eights but you are so beautiful broken digesting the lifetime that I kept in secrets rinds on the sand where we walk reminders that I am the half that dissolves on your beaches every word that I lift breaking its wings to your ears in the current stumbling fear in the houses abandoned but yet you still enter to kiss all the furniture somebody's dead and the system that they left behind is creating this self hate just know that I can be healed if you merge with my broken heart guide me to safety growing in maws that have eaten every dead whale was once a great feeder I am the parasite fate wasn't bleeding catch me like fungus in mouths of the preachers our rooms in the insect breeding desperate for touch and breath in foundations giving birth on the ceiling stuck in the cream I'll scream out your name I dream of your fingers inside me fucking me slow and bent at an angle soothing my loneliness I beg and burden I want to be yours I cry as we tangle I'll break your legs if I have to the void in me shrieking to trap you interlocked digits of you are divine solitude flowers I'm praying for rapture we tear off the night back desperate I strip my skin like a dress giving you my beating breasts the wolves circle snarling protecting my essence verse 2 centipedes scraping crawl out climbing on top of the ends of my arrogance every corner she grasps a million of wasps lays eggs in my terror I cherish I need to be hers but I'm needles I'm freezing in moments and pinning on closeness collapsing it's eco it's fragile I doubt she can heal me the bridges I burn come without her love is allergic I'm swelling her blood is the distance the difference compelling where have I been before now? I'm so frightened wolf in the weeds of the mouth before skeletons she is so patient with cracking my ribs grabbing for atrial ends to the center I sacrifice memories made from my happiness chase to the empty that lies at my pleasure I run to the water's reflection directionless immerse my empty infection cursing my beauty and stare get lost till I starve and wish for my death sentence chorus: you're so good at starving grab the ghost she can't wait to hold you after us but you push and scar her till she's gone don't you dare forgive us after all
2.
Summation Sharp scents dust eyes suicidal weapon in the trenches I died as sleeping beauty but woke as an open chest fill the abandoned with a plot of land that no man should ever handle the stitches made of universal strands that I've commanded I dream of falling apart so the dreamers can cannibalize what was once peaceful while our people die in the streets I find my self worth in a garbage fire filled with priceless paintings the wealthy beg for Mercy and mercy she ain't complaining but if you think I wanted to salvage something, fuck me I'm as void as uranium atoms depleted in with empty space fuck my short attention span pink stretchers line as letters Adderall on the collars bupropion broken etches I want to die in surgery and the sacrifice is so vibrant that the wealthy throw up blood and their lives are soaked in violence that each of my teeth falling like buildings stretched in the climate decays its own ecosystem and stuffs their bodies with ivory will he accept it? what if I don't believe in the hands carving? does my value decrease as I leave my love starved? all the medication pumped in me the city screams as a riot the truth is I don't want to see it and I don't wanna survive it but every moment is disappointing and every second here is a failure why would I speak in tongues when the mouth itself presents danger I find myself cut out like a liar on a deal that wasnt happening but the bullets were confused and came back out my chest cavity and angels weren't just heaven but invested in our evidence of self and soaked in arrogance fate was twin eleven's my eyes were drenched in mercury that Saturn hadn't captured the streets were kissed with more than apathy and broken glasses and every school girl that was once me with visages on the pavement peeled it off and shook the asphalt gravely and spit their names across the who's who who would dare to cross them think nature wouldn't flame them? they unite in the endless void and devour the cowardly nations blasphemy was a landmass but in itself was just a fraction the beginning of a worshiprr transcendent in self and action that didn't want your filthy empires your seventh generations the well spoken vampires or faiths that better raped us your rational speak colonialists sitting trashed and shouting blame while the fascists try to light a cigarette on bodies of the nameless sold and branded by their capitalism better dead than bought off base cancer attached glial cells and bathed in radiation just remember that I'm coming for you and baby I ain't no savior I tasted my last disappointment and dealt with eating failure when the sun eclipses on you and you decay in every statement you had a chance to save yourself but you'll rot empty in her basement Fluster verse 1 I wanted a love song but instead I got choked to death by a transphobe/his argument of hands gripped on my throat I died near a set of trees I ran through in the woods more than a part of me cracked there/ swarming flies lick their fingers around a designer of fear/waiting in the thick of a thought I hear a wolf hungry/ feeding off of doubt and his voice it speaks subtly (VOD) why would anyone love you? your just sexual currency fetishism for men atoning for sins that are better than / sexual pleasure successful/ slights lend their attention near you/ an honor eventually sentences you/ broken teeth on the metal/ I'd let your tranny ass die and nobody would catch me/ even if they come look/ ain't nobody gonna miss you/ you're just a fuck now/ if you're dead it's no issue I wanted a rainstorm/ in its place I got correctively raped just to fake I was "normal"/ She wanted proof that I was manly/ The girl in me screamed at the touch and the terror besat me I wanted a clear mind/ every time I see mirror I lose sense of perception depression/ can't tell if I've ever consented/ it's messed up/ I want a bridge and bottle of medicine sometimes I'm desperate to end it the voice of doubt talking louder and louder my thoughts drowned and they flounder/ my face numb from the powder I feel empowered put the gun in my mouth pull the trigger I'm out of here I'm so fucking beautiful x4 surgery is transcendence pop like a balloon a mess childhood room regression memories are a weapon there's seconds here in between us my lovers of death and presence sexual anesthetic mating dance to impress it laughing like a hyena transforming of my experience I've never really connected here calling foul on my instance she wants to pry off my limits suck on my filthy digits peddle me in the dirt and the blood is my new religion and i'mma let it come fuck me winding up as a lullaby fuck if I ever sleep again sandman tucks in my bloody orgasmic atomic bombs breaking up several continents drowning in my environment wet like a high class prostitute own my body in wholesale the first of collected pennies and i'mma let you spend it but my bones are owed to the centuries ripe for a staircase orgy of money hungry infections I'm shaking now on the handle barely holding my breath savings accounts I'm coming and saving accounts of evil way I've made intricate pieces of Ponzi schemers and thieves I brush on the window broken cut myself for the pleasure wrist is candy coated lick drips off the open tendon I bare my praying mantis Goddexx guide me to discord love that would make me do it I know forever that I'm yours they wanted us to look away while we were burned for our love
3.
Queer Rage What the fuck does it matter? I'm torn apart in the fabric Dying in a void While my family sits passive A nation underneath the bass in their boot steps Crushing under throat of the dream we once kept My heart's up for sale My soul is the bitter acreage You can kill my happiness Bury it in the basement I promise it'll only come back up to haunt you In elections/in your president Daddy's potential Oedipus A new sport We played in your blood currency In this economy We're just laying your rich surgeons And even they can't cut out the cancer your made from So we burn it out and just make some napalm Like you had spread over the people of Vietnam Where do you think we get our violent ideas from? And here you are soon to be product of all our violence What is it you wanna say on behalf of your piousness? If it's begging for your life Don't bother us we've heard it In every person tortured, imprisoned and each murder Your lack of mercy is all of the evidence that we need We didn't come to fix you Just making sure that you bleed They say it's never too late And to never say never But I'm never gonna be happy Unless I'm picking your feathers Out that greedy white carcass The pearls on your pink stretchers Burning down the hospital Serving you rich lechers And don't think I'm gonna be kind to your nurses either Cause Daddy doesn't know best And mommy doesn't want features And doesn't want tv And doesn't want to fix her marriage She doesn't want the relationship Or any of the embarrassment And to be perfectly honest She's feeling a bit cold In frozen bank accounts And predatorial loans Against her siblings Mainly queer people of color Profiting from their struggles Enslaving and killing others She thinks divorce Might not even be a viable option And frankly all her lawyers Are dead in a fresh coffin so.. I guess she's gonna have to Talk to you directly I'm gonna cut you out And don't bother to re infect me Cause if it comes to it I'll end myself to protect people They've suffered more than Their fair share and I can't respect evil I've survived worse and I know that you have to But watching you Poison them is more than I can sit through OVERDOSE you think you're hated girl? (Really?) I'm hunted by nations girl ( hunt you?) I'm wanted by millions that think their savior wants me forsaken girl (But he loves you) The want me stake bound and cuddled up next to friends that died without me (So dramatic) they need me complacent girl (You know they don't) they're losing their patience girl (I doubt it) I'm covered in paint chips and Snowflakes that I've been subsisting off of ( like That's better) winter's coming and so am I I fuck myself on turned up volume (we're all watching) fate smashes my nose in girl (it's only fair) my bones pop in-between her pearls earthquake when I draw her L's time stutters from my tongue here girl chorus shiver with me slither away read love notes in the ash from our buried friends my pronouns are: kill me please (like Everyone one else) my friends aren't as dead as I thought (get over it) they pull stock markets down Nasdaq where my panties fall (well look at you) I suck on the Dow Jones I cup it gently and deepthroat that lozenge the Amazon gets deforested Apple gets a bit more rotten (can we just talk about this?) Nike sits in the corner scared and jacks off slow behind us I sew it's face in the carpet and free them kids in china (fucking hypocrite) with half a face It tries to warn the parties invested standard poor attempts my orgy gets larger than my breasts in mansions (can I touch them?) you might have thought pay meant money (you don't want this) or that power meant control of me but pay here means your control inflates you while your seams start busting and trust me I'm so hungry crystal desert vultures love me (stop what you're doing) they tunnel out through my throat black sand on their feathers dusty You'll find me in pieces girl covered in leeches girl (you can't do this!) meat on my lips and cackling I taste like peaches girl

credits

released April 16, 2017

Kay Ay Em: Main Vox, Production, Concept, Artistic Direction, Performance
My Invisible Friend Bob: Production, Performance, Artistic Direction
Sophia Louize Pakkozicki: Photography, Performance and Artistic Direction

Recorded by: Sendai Mike @ sendaimikebeats@gmail.com
Mixed by KAM
Mastered by LANDR

Backup Vox on OVERDOSE by Michete
Additional Vox on Form and Fluster by Dylan Kloch

Big Thanks To:
Alchemy Union
Sendai Mike
Golden Master
Michete
Dylan Kloch
Sophia
Bob
All my lovely friends and loves

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Worshiprr Los Angeles, California

I am a force of nature.
I am queer and divine.
I will be torn apart by the void and spat out the other side only to do it again.
And I will fucking eat you.

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